(a refurbished, oldie for a little thing called, CATURDAY...)yeah. that's not gonna happen because i spew stuff left and right...and when i shouldn't talk...i talk more than ever. and, well, not to sound like a total snob, but other people's stuff often bore's me. well...not if i know them personally, that is. but then, posting stuff, from people i know and admire, kinda defeats the purpose of being generic in the first place. ugh.
maybe i've just outgrown this shell. like a hermit crab or something... it happens in the blog world, right?? the only problem is, in my heart...the iris shell still fits perfectly. i don't want to switch homes, at all :'( maybe this is more like an eviction...and i need to look at it like that? like...my home was taken over by squatters and i have to leave. okay...that sounds negative still. ugh.
i guess there are other things i could do...i introduced boomy to the g+ world and had a great response. someone mentioned throwing him onto wordpress, someone else mentioned writing a series....those things could work. i'd also like to **attempt** to become more serious as a writer. i always love having writers in my life and there's a reason...our brains work well together. i mean i've already got an entire encyclopedia's worth of photos and i'm realizing that each one already has a story--it just needs the words to make it real. then again...maybe now wanting to write a book, or something, is a bit lofty of a goal. who knows. maybe i need to find a writer who works well with me and work on that. ugh.
i don't know.
i'll keep thinking on this...maybe someone else has a better answer? i have decided that this blog will stay open. i'm proud of all its ramblings and closing it feels sadder than leaving it. i just can't shake the one way mirror thing! and i'm not stoned or paranoid or crazy...i've been watching more carefully since mid june and i can see how many times people read this blog everyday and i can see 'where' the audience comes from--i can't see WHO my very regular people are...but i have some pretty educated guesses. i mean, yes, i have many people who read...but only a certain amount of frequent regulars. yet...despite the daily reads--how many of you comment? do you call me? do you follow up email me about anything? do you hold out a hand, or ask me for coffee when you can tell things are rough? do you congratulate me when things are good? do you post your own blog for me to read? do you actually 'follow' this blog? are you friends with me on any social networks? do you keep your social networking 'open' for me to see...or do you just read everything on mine and privatize everything on yours?
i don't know why this is buggin' me so much lately...but, i just can't shake it. and, like everything else, i'll get over it... **sigh**
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