(i love these like i haven't loved anything i've done in a long time)tonight, while driving down the 40 mile long, 70 mile per hour river of concrete that leads me home, i started feeling just, well, stressed.
i am so sick of this treading water feeling. in every aspect of my life i am simply treading...and i think i'm starting to drown. my legs are getting cramped.
relationship...yep. treading.
work...yep. treading there too.
finances...yep. treading, no wait, drowning there.
it sucks. like, super sucks. i'm always late. always not feeling like enough. always broke. always rushed. always lacking. always never enough. i don't have a bail out by any means and i'm not sure i'm enough to be it all to them all. i just feel so damn alone in all this.
in the time being, while treading water, i keep forgetting about me. i'm so concerned about the leg cramps i can't focus on being hungry, or lonely, or tired, or sick, or bored. i just have to keep treading.
i am not willing to except this as the norm. apparently, i need to find a way out of this shit before i really do drown...
YAY alec baldwin. he just won an emmy. 30 rock is such an effin good show.
wow. that's my a.d.d for ya. welcome to it.
No comments:
Post a Comment