maybe i just needed a nice, flowery moo moo

(just one of the many...)

i had a really nice shoot tonight with a really nice family :) i definitely remembered, once again, why i don't care to be pregnant. i mean, i see these other pregnant woman and they look so beautiful. their clothes flatter them, their hair looks great and they just, well, seem to glow.

and then i think about me being pregnant.

i became a giant...i never just the whole put on a belly. my arms, my legs, my feet, my hips, my fingers, my face...yeah, it all expanded quite rapidly and i would just waddle around running into everything-- sending things crashing to the floor left and right. i never glowed, i sweated profusely and my hair, well i hated it because it always felt greasy, so both times i cut it all off--like that would make me look better or something...nope, i just appeared to be a cross dressing man with a weight problem and enormous beer belly then. i was emotionally unstable...one minute crying because i hit two lights red in a row and was sure the whole world was against me and it wasn't fair, to laughing hysterically at the fact i had actually just thought the whole world was actually against me because i hit two lights red in a row. my clothes always felt incredibly unsexy, nothing about me ever felt cute or cuddly and whenever i would drop food, it would inevitably wind up finding a home on my massively protruding gut--leaving a trashy little grease stain for all the world to see.

then again, one would expect an overweight man with a beer gut the size of a pregnant woman's belly to have a grease stain or two i suppose...