catch ya on the flip side

(my kid totally set this pic up and told me to take it...i love it)

i'm leaving tomorrow for a couple days...it should be good.

i haven't really posted too much substance lately, so i hope i won't be too missed...i'm sure i won't be...i'm off to watch stripes now (as soon as muppets in space gets over that is). i have this weird thing for bill murray comedies from the 80's when i'm home alone.

too tired for a title two

milk weed pods are sticky and bitter. don't ask how i know they're bitter...

i had such a lousy day..

written at 8. posted at ten. a.m and p.m.

(i love lavender...i'm gonna stick it in mt drawers and take baths with it and stuff)

wow. so yeah...last night, i COMPLETELY forgot to blog. seriously. somehow, something that i have done 200 or some odd days in a row i never even thought to do last night. i remembered while sitting in traffic this morning.

i also forgot to roll up my window last night in my truck and, of course, it poured. i just used the sweater i'm wearing to soak up the monstrous puddle on my seat...i figure i should dry out by noon or so. so THIS morning it's fall out boy with a splash of +44 and a lot of coffee to get me going...

is it four...no wait, five...nope, six yet?

i just got to work.

this morning...blink 182 and a cup of coffee are what i need. well, actually a couple cups of joe may be in order...

i should go do something productive now...though i'm sure that to the cube next door, the clicking of my keyboard keys could be misconstrued as productiveness and enthusiasm to get a jump start on the day...hmmm...

hey...didn't i just leave this place by the way...?

these are the last car pics, i swear

i am having the most shit-tastic night; i even felt the need to make up a new word to describe it.

this site made me laugh though. well, not tonight...nothing is making me laugh tonight. it did the other day...

http://pictures.streakr.com/ohio.htm

i was hoping for the ships scenario

a late night call, from a late night friend, who's lost in a world that seems a million miles away was what tonight held.

laying in the desert, he talked about the stars; and sitting on my patio, i talked about the chicken pox. every now and then, silence conquered the line as, i think, we'd both pause and try to picture where the other one was--and maybe even catch a whiff of their air. mine familiar to him, his exotic to me...i think, in a way, the vicarious way we live through each other is what keeps us close--despite the days without calls and weeks without e-mail as of late.

tonight, he talked about his future and thanked me for the friendly voice; i talked about my present and thanked him for the same. he asked me what my week held and how things were going and i asked him the same.




*pause*

you have no idea the stars out here, it's insane...and the days are so hot. only 22 more days till i leave...i should be home in april or may sometime. i'm not sure about that whole re-enlisting thing anymore. i'm not really nervous yet actually; i just want to leave. i hate this waiting.

*pause*

yeah, i spose...what's the point of getting nervous, huh? it's not like you have a choice. i know it'll fly by...look how fast these last few years went. remember how pissed i was when you told me you enlisted for five? you should see the moon right now. it finally cooled off; it was like 90 and humid today. 94 actually, i think...maybe.

*pause*

yeah. i'll be like 30 soon. that's a big deal. i just want something to kind of fall into my lap you know...?

*pause*

i hear ya. i think we all want that.

*pause*

yeah.

*pause*

this shit sucks.

*pause*

i can't even imagine dude.

*pause*

yeah. well...i spose. you should get to bed...it's what, 11:30 where you're at? i actually get to sleep till 7 tomorrow.

*pause*

yeah. you should really get some sleep too. i know i should go to bed, though i know i won't. sleep good...sweet dreams.

*pause*

you too...




i didn't think this would be this hard for me. but after almost ten years of talking almost every day, at least once, this is something that came more like getting the wind knocked out of me than simply watching the ships sail from the coast.

can't talk...friends here

please excuse iris's absence last night...she borrowed her lap top to the kids to watch my little ponies.



that was like a note to a teacher, huh?

all that's missing is a poorly forged signature of my mom...

maybe i have a hole in it

(i told ya i'd have more...)

every now and then, when i close my eyes in the shower, something doesn't work right. tonight, my eyelid must have leaked again because it hurt something awful...still does--twenty minutes later, it still does.

oh, and i learned visine is not a good idea as a solution. it burns so bad. like, there's a little fire's stuck inside your eyeball kind of bad. i just want the thing to water...right now, it just feels like i'm blinking sand paper.

goodnight moon

...sittin here restin my bones...

for some reason i've had otis redding whistling circles through my head lately--so, i went to the marina and took pictures...because that's what seemed right.

yay for rain...

(i finally got to wear the boots...i bought them right before a drought, go figure)

i would rather be asleep...

(there will be more to come...)

so, i finally saw juno. i'm quite convinced the writer knows me somehow and that i should receive some sort of royalty...or at least some sunny d. i hate that crap though...it makes my tummy hurt.

shit. i really need to go to sleep...

i think i just purged a little...

aargh...so i'm in this creative drought lately. it's not that i'm losing my creativity or anything...it's that i'm so freakin busy, i can't find the time. it sucks.

tomorrow...i'm shootin for an old car show to water the dry. i'm going to try to squeeze it in; in between my work/training, my desperate need to get to the bank, feeding my friend's cat, my guys schedule and my kids schedule...i'm gonna try. it's like an itch in your hockey skate during a game when you know you're on the next shift...you can't ignore it...it keeps getting worse but there's nothing you can do about it. that's me lately.

i'm calling it a day...

...goodnight.

old macdonald had a farmers market...

so i spent ten bucks at the farmers market today. i got four big tomatoes, seven zucchini's, a whole buncha red potatoes, a ton of sweet carrots, four giant white onions and five honey sticks for the kid. plus, it was free ice cream sundae day...so i had one of them too.

i don't know why you care about my farmer's market trip actually. i think i'll just go watch more olympics now...

seriously...i didn't love you

(being broke makes me actually make things...like spaghetti sauce)

well...my kid has been handed down the old, works-most/some-of-the-time, digital camera. and tonight, she made another movie. this time, it was about a minute and a half of a faucet running, and stopping, and running, and stopping, and ultimately...running again.

it was way better than the latest x-files movie. like way better.

did they really think that any movie involving a pedophile psychic and an underground russian head transplant ring would be a good idea? oh yeah...how did i forget about the kid with the horrible disease and the stem cell research? (which had NOTHING to do with the story, btw) seriously chris carter....you had ten years. TEN FREAKIN YEARS!

davey...you looked hot as usual (after you stopped channeling grizzly adams that is). i totally second bree sharp's motion, but that's why i watch californication. maybe you should write the next movie.

if you have nothing nice to say...say nothing at all...

i'm not sure if he enjoyed that...

happy olympics day

so...due to the olympics...i now have a tv in my kitchen. the old, little one that's been moving with me since 2001 finally has a use.

we moved in, in october and have yet to get cable. we get a couple local channels that come in...kinda...but that's all. we don't really care. but when i realized it was olympics time and i had no way to watch it, i panicked. so between the little tv in the garage and the old rabbit ears...i get to watch...it even comes in good. really.

don't ask...

so yeah, i STILL have video killed the radio star in my head.
why?
seriously...why?
i mean, with all the stuff i have going on why does that song have to spin right round baby right round in my head...?

in my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far...

(my backyard is a'bloom...that sounded stupid...i know)

it's a disturbing day when paris hilton's energy policy makes more sense than anyone else's. come on obama and mccain...listen to the porn star billionaire who's dating the punk rocker with all those tattoos...she actually makes sense.

i should be asleep...

maybe i just needed a nice, flowery moo moo

(just one of the many...)

i had a really nice shoot tonight with a really nice family :) i definitely remembered, once again, why i don't care to be pregnant. i mean, i see these other pregnant woman and they look so beautiful. their clothes flatter them, their hair looks great and they just, well, seem to glow.

and then i think about me being pregnant.

i became a giant...i never just the whole put on a belly. my arms, my legs, my feet, my hips, my fingers, my face...yeah, it all expanded quite rapidly and i would just waddle around running into everything-- sending things crashing to the floor left and right. i never glowed, i sweated profusely and my hair, well i hated it because it always felt greasy, so both times i cut it all off--like that would make me look better or something...nope, i just appeared to be a cross dressing man with a weight problem and enormous beer belly then. i was emotionally unstable...one minute crying because i hit two lights red in a row and was sure the whole world was against me and it wasn't fair, to laughing hysterically at the fact i had actually just thought the whole world was actually against me because i hit two lights red in a row. my clothes always felt incredibly unsexy, nothing about me ever felt cute or cuddly and whenever i would drop food, it would inevitably wind up finding a home on my massively protruding gut--leaving a trashy little grease stain for all the world to see.

then again, one would expect an overweight man with a beer gut the size of a pregnant woman's belly to have a grease stain or two i suppose...

aren't you bald yet...?

day two of having abbie around went well. this dog sheds like crazy though. i figure if i just vacuum like eight times a day it should be ok. and she doesn't shed like a hair or two here and there...it's more like a clump or two here and there. my dad made it to sturgis and he called to say hi, though i think it was more of a check-up-on-abbie call. either way...i'll take it. i always worry about him driving all that way on his bike...sans the helmet. he doesn't believe in them.

i'm feeling stress in life lately. i don't know why. it's probably money...i actually spent some this time. it's like this i can't catch up stress that i'm struggling with and trying to combat before the inevitable melt down. these next couple of weeks are going to be pretty busy for me--i like being busy, but these upcoming weeks aren't really going to be full of the busy-ness i like. it's the busy-ness that feels confusing, smothering and chaotic. it's got me to the point where i'm constantly wrestling with these, 'is/was it even worth it' questions. i don't wrestle with those ever...i just do it and deal with it later...if i feel like it. i have really exciting things going on too, but they feel a bit overshadowed by the negative i'm feeling. it's hard not to get consumed in the negative, no matter how positively you look at life on a general basis. it's all for the best...i keep telling myself that. i'm just waiting to really feel like that too...

the adventures of abbie and iris

well, my dad left for sturgis.

my job, while he's gone, is to babysit abbie: his big, black, furry, wild mutt of a dog...who also happens to be the sweetest, funniest, softest, teddy bear of a dog ever. first thing she got, upon entering my house, was a bath. no, she didn't really stink that bad or anything (according to my dad anyway), but after a bath free summer--that's included lots of dead fish rolling and slimy frog munching-- i figured she was due. my dad is a total bachelor who really doesn't mind the smell but me, as a mom, minds it quite a lot. the worst smell my house typically encounters is a rotten glass of milk left around by the kid...er, ok, well, maybe me too here and there.

the only problem is that i just keep having this dilemma with her 'baby'. that thing is the nastiest, smelliest, dirtiest, used-to-be pink-but-is-now-poopy brown bunny ever. it's terrible. it's still in the bed of my truck. i'm thinking tomorrow i may just put in in the back yard for her and hope she doesn't try to smuggle it inside. (though i know she will.)

she also has this thing where she truly believes she is a lap dog. tonight, while playing mario kart with my kid, she stood up, looked at me and in almost slow motion, climbed up onto my recliner, stood on top of me and lazily circled three doggy circles before laying right across my lap. the only problem with this whole thing is that she weighs just about 70 lbs. i didn't have the heart to tell her to move. i know she's feeling a little depressed...she had a really rough start in life; she was bounced from home to home and was beat up pretty bad...she has separation issues. her and my dad are so close; he fork feeds her occasionally and sleeps with her under the blankets if she's cold. i was the one who brought her home to him in '00 and i lived with her for a couple of years so she's quite used to me, but it's still hard on her. in a day or two i think she'll be better...either way, i do enjoy having her around.

it's like christmas...only better

well, i got the new lens :) it's so cool. serious. i'm such a little kid about all this...but it's so exciting. all my pics were done in my back yard with it today...my new tripod came too. it's so cool. serious.

i contemplated calling into work tomorrow due to it. then i remembered that i'm now 900.00 in the hole so, if anything, i should be staying there late...like REALLY late. like see ya in the fall kinda late...

i'm still trying to find out where the spider is that made that massive web, btw. i bet it looks really cool...the spider, that is...the web is awesome.