you are my sunshine

i received these beautiful flowers tonight from an even more beautiful friend. she's going through incredibly hard stuff right now but still thought about me...knowing i've been down.

i really want to be more like her. i hope someday to be close...she's a great goal to have :)

thank you. tonight, your company and your thoughtfulness touched me more than you know.

see ya in seven

(this is from two years ago but i still love it...)

so, my best friend's gone. to iraq. i knew the day would come when he'd call me to say the plane's about to leave, but i avoided thinking about it.

he called me yesterday around 7 am to say that final goodbye. it was 5 am his time. he had been pretty wasted a few hours previous to that but the little bit of sleep he had had, had taken the edge off the drunk apparently. he sounded pretty good. i didn't really know the right words to say. hey...watch out for bombs, i hear they fall out of the sky over there. or, hey...look out for them terrorists, i think they think they're at war. everything sounded stupid, so i mostly sat there thinking about the silence...and trying to not sound like an idiot when i did finally find some words. we finally said good-bye, and said our i love you's, and said our be good's, and said our i'll miss you's and such.

i know he'll be fine. he's only there for seven months and most of my misery over this is self-centered. i've spoke to him at least once a day for ten years now. we lived together for about three of those years. my kid adores him and i'm at a bit of a loss when my 'regular' becomes irregular. i'm not so swift in the change department, ok? i feel like i just lost my favorite shoes. the ones i wear every day and depend on for comfort. you know...the one's that fit your feet the best.

and then these unthinkable thoughts get in my brain and i can't get them out. i shake my head and i think of things like shopping and unpaid bills to distract myself, but nothing works too well. i left in the middle of my workshop yesterday to go just cry. i didn't want to look like a weirdo in front of all of my co-workers and i couldn't hold it in. i'm scared to death that, at best case scenerio, he'll change. he's so perfect the way he is. i always picture this picture i had of him, maybe 6, on his birthday, with red balloons, a cowboy hat, a holster (complete with cap gun), a giant smile, some cowboy boots, cute little dumbo ears and wearing nothing but undies. it was so him and still is.

like i said, i know he'll be fine; i know everyone must think the worst when someone they love goes to war. i just keep writing him, just like during boot camp. i write everyday. when i'm bored, or stressed, or saw something hillarious that i need to share, or saw something incredibly stupid that i need to share, or, well, just whenever. i just continue it on one piece of paper and send it all toward the end of the week. i send pictures and stuff too. he said, in bootcamp, it really helped him feel connected. i can't wait to send him actual packages of stuff and i can't wait to start christmas shopping for him! last year, i got him lots of things to do on airplanes because he was traveling a lot. this year...well, i'll ask him what he misses most.

so yeah...that's about that. he's in iraq now. i am so proud of him. he's a world away, and he's a marine, and he's my best friend and he's living a pretty incredible adventure. but damn do i miss him.

bookin a day in advance

(HE will be tomorrow's post...)

eh. i don't feel like talking about yesterday's post. i should though, huh...? since i said i would.

ok, so anyway...there was this guy who called my work; he wanted to propose to his girlfriend there. i was all like yeah, whatever...you have to pay admission blah, blah, blah...i'll see what i can do, if i can do anything at all. my boss and co-worker, however, talked to him during my weekend and were all like, awwwww...that is SO sweet! you can come in on sunday like you wanted, iris will be there and will do whatever you need to make your special day work and don't worry about a thing, or admission, or anything; she'll do it all. (ok, so it wasn't exactly like that...but whatever.)

anyway, on my monday...all i got in my 'notes', was that he left a fake 'prize' at my cube that he told her he 'won' in a drawing and that he needed to come into the museum to pick it up...i would have to figure out the rest. so yeah, while rolling my eyes...i wrote up a congratulatory letter telling him to enjoy his new games with his family (i made up some family outreach thing to encourage play time outside of the museum, yada, yada, yada.) see, his goal was to somehow get her into the museum to pop the question. i attached some museum logo stuff to the package i wrapped his 'prizes' in and attatched the letter (hence yesterday's photo). when they got to the museum i told him that with our 'family outreach program' we typically give out free tickets to the museum but since they didn't have kids, and since the weather was rainy and cold, they were more than welcome to come in and look around. (he was a slightly bumbly fellow and i saw him start to panic at this point...later, i found out that he wasn't sure i knew about the plan and thought i was serious. that explained his incessant winking around that same time.) i gave him his 'prizes' and sent them on their way. his girlfriend was completely clueless. in fact, she seemed slightly annoyed that he insisted they utilize the free passes and looked like she wanted to leave. i encouraged her to loosen up and have some fun. at one point, i thought she might tell me to shut up or better yet, smack me.

ten minutes later, i get a call from security saying he was asking for me. (i made it clear to him that i had left my personal number on his congratulatory letter--in case he needed anything or had any questions.) i walked back up front, slightly rolling my eyes again, to find the girlfriend, now fiance, happily chirping away on her cell phone to some other chirpy woman i'm sure. the guy was in this fluttery sort of, in-love-she-actually-said-yes-i'm-getting-married sort of shock. it was undeniably sweet...not in a roll your eyes sort of way, but in an ouch-my-teeth-hurt kind of way. they both gave me massive props on my fibbing abilities that made me feel good. in an, i-shouldn't-be-proud-of-this sort of way, and that was that. i did my part in a stranger's life and my good deed for the day. yay.

from the girl that refuses to watch a romantic comedy because she despises them, it was actually cute...not in a heather grahm/matthew mc conoughhey sort of way though, but in a meg ryan/tom hanks kinda way, i think.

oh, for the record, my favorite romatic comedy sorta flick is true romance. there's lots of blood...and tony soprano gets a cork screw in the toe.

oh yeah...it's a sappy one too...

i will blog about this picture tomorrow.

see...it's a strange, and somewhat long story, that if i get into now, could take me until quite possibly 11:00 and i need to sleep--instead of blogging about the strange and somewhat long story surrounding that picture.

i hate the last day of my weekend

geez. i just don't have anything to write tonight. it sucks. all day i've been thinking about all these things i wanted to say and then when i layed down, i went blank. (i don't really think layed is a word, is it?)


well, i did a lot today and ate a lot too.

hmmm...that's all i got i guess.

wow. that was pretty lame...it reminds me of a second graders journal entry.

ouch

(a flu germ)

(i don't know what this is but it was SO cool)

not the best pics tonight--but i spent the day at the science museum so you get what ya get.

so, i got a tetanus shot the other day and i am having a lousy reaction. it sucks. i hate typing because i pretty much do it all left handed lately...one finger, left-handed. which is cool, but it takes forever to write one sentence.

i'm going to bed. me and my sore arm will hopefully sleep better tonight.

yuck...shiver...

(some of the last flowers in my yard...)

yeah, so instead of caring too much about the stupid (ok, important) v.p. debate tonight, i got drunk, played mario kart and ate skittles instead.

look, i've been at work for the last 12 days of my life. two days off is worth the jim beam. (i hate that shit btw...)